They're all clones!

This is in honor of doppelganger week. (or as I sometimes say, 'Doppler'ganger. Which sounds like something you'd call a meteorological gang member.)

In 1996, scientists first successfully cloned a sheep, and playfully named her Dolly. (Yes, after Dolly Parton. Ask me why sometime, or better yet look it up for yourself.)
So they say. Of course, it's not like you can tell the average sheep apart from each other anyway, so how could you know? "Oh, look, they're identical! We did it!"
My neighbor has a flock that he lets out occasionally, and believe me they're

hard to tell apart.

"Ah-ha! Look, that one's got a spot on his leg right there, see? Right ther- oh, nevermind, he just stepped in some mud and it splashed a bit, sorry..."
My opinion? Scientists should have picked a species a bit more distinguishable if they really wanted to impress people.
Interesting fact; All navel oranges are actually clones, with the exact genetic makeup of the original tree planted in a monastery in Brazil in 1820. Because they are seedless, and therefore sterile, the only way to produce more is by cutting and grafting.
I worry that if I ever cloned myself, my clone would scheme to usurp me and force me to perform menial labor for the rest of my sorry existence. And of course we would debate over who was the evil one-
"I was the evil one last week, it's your turn now!"
"No it isn't. And besides, you've already got the beard."
No arguing with that. Everyone knows the evil twin's the one with the beard.
Just once I'd like a character to be introduced WITH a beard, so that later when we meet his doppleganger he's clean shaven.

Once again, this post brought to you with the advantage of not having a clue what I'm talking about, which I've found greatly improves the readability of my posts.
So long! And don't clone around.

Pets...sort of.

If I had a pet, I would name him/her/it "Peeves".

I'm not really a lovey-dovey person when it comes to pets, I can take them or leave them...

But I do have some pet-peeves. For example, I've noticed that people don't bow down to me every time we meet (And by "meet" I mean them following at a respectful 10 feet behind). This annoys me...

And many more!

Hello, everybody!

Today (Mon, Jan 4) was Sir Isaac Newton's 367 birthday. He didn't do much to celebrate however, and I'm pretty sure he's dead. My condolences to his family.
Anyway, once upon a time, Sir Isaac Newton was sitting in the shade of a fig tree eating a sandwich. All of a sudden he was hit on the head from a fig that had flown off of its branch, because Jesus had cursed the tree. Because it was a hot day, the fig had gotten very mushy and when it hit Newton on his head it splatted and slid off, and some of it got into his sandwich that he was eating. Then Newton shouted "Eureka!" and came up with the Fig Newton.
Oh, yeah, and he also invented gravity, I'm pretty sure.

So you see, great things can happen when figs have wings.

We came, we saw, we shopped.

Went shopping today in the City (Which, to us means Albany-Schenectady).
Saw Santa.
Seth: "Santa! I know him!"
"Make-A-Memory With Santa!", the sign read. "Deluxe Photo Package, $19.99."
I idly thought about popping up behind Santa's chair and including myself in all the photos. That would certainly give them a memory...
We, the family, ever looking for a bargain, have decided to sneak a camera and tripod of our own into Colonie Center Mall and take our family Christmas portrait in front of the large mall fireplace. Tee-hee.

Favorite story of the day:
Mom asking Dad why there was an extension cord stretched out on the front lawn.
Dad's response?
"Oh, I'm just letting all the electricity drain out so it doesn't freeze when I put it away for the Winter."
...
You know, it's a wonder I turned out to be so serious minded...

Noted Man Accepts Posthumous Award, is Speechless

The enemy of genius isn't idiocy, it is the average.
The main opposition to genius is often brought from people who are actually quite rational and intelligent, who's semi-knowledge is worse than no knowledge whatsoever. Their preconceived ideas, carefully regurgitated to them by the previous generation, comprise of the totality of their reality. Nothing else is possible, and that, my friends is what makes it so maddening. Any brilliant idea is almost always thought laughable by the status quo.
Just ask all the posthumously-recognized geniuses of the past 500 years...
Indeed, genius probably has more in common with insanity than anything. Where do you draw the line?

I do not know, go ask your Dad.

Poem, A

Upon Seeing A Woman Pushing A PULL Door

I smirk, I sneer, I look askance at her stupidity.

How could anyone be so dumb is far beyond me!

I laughingly walk to it, it easily opens,

Now through it, I glance behind as I go.

And with graceful step and blithe face

plant fully in unyielding second door.

"Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall."

Proverbs 16:18

New: The Media Bible!

Exerpt from a conversation from any given movie or tv show when the Bible is discussed.

Hero Type: "Rev, I just don't get the Bible. With my keen intellect that is the product of our Utopian modern educational system, I know it to be scientifically false. It just doesn't make sense!"

Wise Father/Religious Type: "Son, it doesn't have to make sense. The Bible isn't about facts, it's about faith!" he says wisely. "You just have to believe..."

Yeeeaacchh. You might as well tell him to clap his hands, too...

Sorry, I just couldn't take it any more.